LIFE AS CHAD KNOWS IT

Be The Change!

2012-02-14T23:45:00.014-06:00

As The Beatles once sang, "All you need is love, love; love is all you need."

Can you imagine a world with no hate? Think of how much stronger the world would be if we could all come together as one. No war or discrimination... The funds for starvation? A cure for cancer? The ability to live on the next planet?

Love could change the world!

Today on Twitter the following two tweets stood out to me the most:

I agree 110% with both post. Love is love is love, and no one should ever be deny the right to love. However, that is not the case... How can we strive for world peace when we don't even have our own peace in America. I want to love my country, Obama... I want to be proud to be an American, but how can I when there is the fear of walking down the street holding hands. There is the fear to love. There is governmental discrimination amongst the citizens. There is hate in the world...

BUT, I still stand!

I am not a second-class citizen. You are not a second-class citizen. It is okay to be yourself!

If you haven't been on Facebook or you simply live under a rock, I wanted to remind you that today is Valentine's day. I would like to encourage everyone to spread some extra love. We can't change people; they can only change themselves. We can, however, lead by example, and it's time! It's time to show your support for someone who needs you. Tell someone you are there for them, but most importantly, don't hate or discriminate... Because, the world is changing... Slavery abolished, women's right to vote, the first black president... And now, marriage equality! It will happen, everywhere... It's just a matter of time.

"Be the change you want to see in the world!" - unknown

Happy Valentine's Day, and thank you so much to the following people who went out of their way to spread a little extra love for me; I am truly grateful:

Lucas Martin, My Mother, My Sister, Rachel DiBenedtto, Samantha Fisher, Mary Potts, Briana Felix, Nicola Piazza, Ryan Mason, David Brasher, Tiffany Phillips, Brett Schuhler, Hunter Moffett, Ryan Boe, Aden Hollowell, Brian Gelp, Rhianna Clausen, Heidi Hagenlocher, and Marty Hawkins

One last thing... Check out Google's doodle for Valentine's Day 2012 [video below]. It makes me smile really big, and totally reminds me of me--jump rope and all. ♥

A Tadpole Who Could Not Swim

2012-01-22T05:07:00.007-06:00

There once was a tadpole who could not swim.

His mother was quite disappointed with him.

But, no matter how hard the tadpole wiggled his tail, he would always sink back to the bottom.

All the fish would make fun of him. He was sad.

As time went on the tadpole grew legs. Frustrated with him, his mother explained, "you cannot live at the bottom of this pond forever. You must learn to swim, or you will not survive."

The tadpole was so embarrassed he started digging and digging and digging into the pond ground with his newly formed legs. He wanted to hide from the world, never having to show his face ever again. Though, as he was digging and digging and digging, he realized that the dirt was mounding up and up and up.

He used the dirt to jump up and up and up until he almost surfaced the top of the pond. Finally, he was able to take a giant leap onto the land leaving the pond behind him. He saw a new world, larger than he could ever imagine; it had no boundaries. The creature that once was a tadpole who could not swim was now a frog who was able to jump and explore the world in ways that mean fish would never be able to explore. He was happy!

Life can flood us with problems allowing us to sink to the bottom where we feel we may drowned. It is easy to give up. However, it is up to us to figure out what to do with the dirt at the bottom of the pond.

You can either dig and bury yourself alive or climb to the top to enjoy the view.

I choose to use the dirt to build character allowing me to climb back to the top.

What do you choose?

A break up is like a broken mirror...

2012-01-12T16:56:00.000-06:00

... It's better to leave it broken than to hurt yourself to fix it.

Right now I’m sitting outside with shorts and a Washington Huskies t-shirt on watching the sunset. The lovely gradient of oranges fading into blues fills the sky. It’s so weird that this is what my January feels like—67 degrees. It feels nice! Wait! January! This is my first post of the new year... I better make it a good one. Speaking of:

HaPpY NeW YeAr!

Hmmm....

WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN!?

All the words I want to say are jumbled up in my head, and I don't know how to put them into text. When this happens, I usually just give up and say/type nothing... But, since its a new year, I'm going to try really hard to put my thoughts into words...

To be continue!

***

So, I started this post yesterday because I thought I had something really good to say, but here I am a day later trying to finish the post. It actually feels like a January day today, however. Louisiana weather is so bipolar--it's ridiculous. Speaking of bipolar, my feelings have been running wild lately. I don't know how to control them. I feel okay one minute and then the next I just want to be close to someone special. Talking with several friends and people I know, they seem to relate to this feeling when it comes to relationships. So, I'm here to say to them and to remind myself... Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it's better to leave them broken than to try to hurt yourself putting them back together... The key word is SOMETIMES!

I have a secret that most of you might know. I am the most stubborn at times... AND, this is what I truly think:

Who am I to give relationship advise? Who am I to try to understand how you feel? No one but you knows what truly goes through your head and what makes your heart beat faster. Only you know!

Super Glue [some prefer duct tape] and band aids... It's all you need. Valuables. Priceless pieces. Irreplaceables [yes, this is a word in the Chadish language]. Somethings are worth gluing back together. Don't give up on the ones that make you feel. They are truly a rarity. So, chin up and in the words of DHT, "listen to your heart."

This post goes out to all my single ladies; my single ladies [and whoever else can relate]... Hehe. But, you know who you are.

When I see your smile and know it's not me, that's when I miss you.

Update:

I, @RhadCankin, have officially hit rock bottom... I have been #PeerPressured into creating a "Twatter." Follow me if you dare!

Follow @RhadCankin

P.S. I'm a fast learner... Look at that hashtag used properly! Hehe!

Slow down, and enjoy it for awhile!

2011-12-25T00:32:00.002-06:00

First and foremost, Happy Christmas Eve! I hope everyone has had a lovely holiday thus far. Only one day until Christmas (really 30 mins 'til). Sadly, I have to work tomorrow, but that's okay because people get sick on holidays too. Though, I'm hoping to be called off and that the doctors magically discharged all the patients today--finger and toes crossed, haha. Speaking of work, it's going really well. I am 100% glad I chose nursing as a profession. It's such a gratifying career, and I would recommend it to anyone who is unsure of what they want to do with their life. I have learned so many things while working. Of course I have learn how to be a better nurse, and I'm improving my skills. But, I have also learned life lessons that have helped me be a better person as well. I abso-freakin-lutely love what I do.

Just a little update... So much has been going on in my life that I don't even know where to start, and I don't know how I feel about it. However, I wont bore you with the depressing things. I will, on the other hand, say that I'm going back to my old ways. I'm going to be optimistic Chad because that's who I am. That's who I love to be. That's who people see me as.

Today, it hit me... I have been really bummed out about certain things that I haven't put thought into being thankful for what I do have. I know Thanksgiving is long gone, but I'm truly thankful for everything I have--friends, family, warmth, food, a good job! We open gifts tonight because I have to work tomorrow, and I got a lot of great things (pictured to the left). However, what do these things truly mean to me? Yes, I love what I got, but they are just materialistic objects that fulfill my wants but not my needs. What if I didn't have the friends or family that I have? Life would be rather lonely and pointless if you ask me. I would give the world for the people in my life (and for the ones too far away to be in my life). I truly feel that I could go without any presents and be content because life is so precious; great people/friends/family are so rare these days.

At my sister's tonight, her husband's friend Antonio was sorta intoxicated, but said something to me that got me thinking. I was on the computer while eating pizza. He took the computer away from me and said, "Enjoy your meal. Relax. Slow down a little. You're always on the go. You talk fast. You walk fast. Slow down!" I was almost in shock, but I shut my computer anyways. I ate my pizza, and I observed life, the existence happening around me. I saw children at play. Adult interaction. I saw laughter. And excitement. And warmth. And love. I saw life. I saw all of this under one roof, in one room. I saw what's easily missed each day by a nation that's always on the go. Life, it's taken for granted. As I sat on the couch eating my pizza, I thought... Man, I'm a lucky guy to have this. I'm a lucky guy to have this family. I'm lucky to have these friends. I'm lucky to have all my friends. I'm lucky to have YOU! I'm truly lucky just to be living! This is the true meaning of Christmas. Being loved and loving! Life. Believing.

I love you!

Now that it's after midnight here in good ole Louisiana, I think it's safe to say... MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL AND ALL A WONDERFUL NIGHT!

"Life doesn't move too fast or slow... But because you move faster than life, you think it's going too slow... So slow down and enjoy it for awhile." -- Antonio Larkins

Also, I was bored yesterday, so I decided to do a little doodling on my computer. Meet my alter ego, Ranch (pictured to the right).

:-)

Advocate for Equality: Love Don't Hate

2011-12-14T19:28:00.000-06:00

With all of the recent talk about marriage equality, I have decided not to type a post but to create a vlog instead. I'll stop typing now and let the video speak for itself. Enjoy!

Solitude

2011-12-06T03:35:00.006-06:00

I'm confused on what to do. I'm lost. Empty. It's hard to be strong 100% of the time. This is one of those times. My stomach feels weird, and I feel lonely. The truth is I'm weak, and I need a hug. I need a hug from YOU. I hurt, but for that moment in time when your arms are wrapped around me, nothing else seems to matter. The butterflies start fluttering in my stomach; they make my belly tingle. My breath is taken away. I feel safe. I feel perfect. I'm happy again. Infinite...

... but right now, I'm empty. I'm incomplete solitude, and I need a hug!

$$$$$

Living Young and Wild and Free

2011-11-27T05:15:00.009-06:00

This post is dedicated to the kid that lives inside me that will forever be young.

Recently, I have been doing a little soul searching. I've been thinking. Who am I? What have I've become? Where am I going? What is my purpose in life?

For anyone, these questions may prove to be puzzling. I don't even know where to start in order to answer them. However, while I was in Books-A-Million yesterday day, I adventured over to the children's section of the store. I started reading several books that have not only inspired me throughout my youth and adolescent years, but have also continue to inspire me now [books listed below].

As a kid we imagine, we create dreams, we play, and we are oblivious to the outside dangers of the world. During our childhood everything seems perfect. Our biggest fear is the monster that lives in the closet, who never reveals him/herself. Yet, we are still afraid of this unknown creature. However, the look in the closet from our parents is always reassuring and comforts us. As children, we know not the value of a dollar, but if we have one [only one], we know we are rich. The perception of children is so innocent. The world isn't black. The world isn't harmful. The world is perfect, unless we can't have the toy we begged our mother for.

Then one day, as we grow, we change. The imagination runs dry. Our play is limited. We no longer are scared of the monster in the closet, but we are defeating him/her for our own children. Worldly dangers are all around us, and we suddenly realize that there is so much more to fear than some imaginary creature. Life... It's scary!

Yesterday, after I read the children's stories, I closed my eyes. I imagined myself back in daycare/class listening to the teachers read me these same exact stories. For that split second I was back to my youth, and the world was perfect again. After a minute or so, I decided to step foot back into reality. Back into a world that's black where hearts are cold. The reality is we grow, we learn more, we see more, and we know more. However, as we grow and our bodies change, our hearts don't have to. Our hearts can stay pure. They can stay young. We all have an inner child that is begging to play. So, imagine, dream, and play! Stay young at heart. Share the love; don't take it. Do no harm. Forever young. Forever loved.

Here's to the youth in all of us!
Q: How do you make a napkin dance?
A: You put a wittle boogie in it.

Recommended Children's Books:

The Giving Tree

by Shel Silverstein

Oh! The Places You'll Go

by Dr. Suess

The Artist Who Painted A Blue Horse

by Eric Carle

Love You Forever

by Robert Munsch

If You Give A Moose A Muffin

by Laura Numeroff

It was a dark and "starry" night...

2011-11-15T01:32:00.024-06:00

... It was infinite.

If I could invent a device that allow people to travel to a place through a photograph, I would travel to the place pictured to the right. Here, I see a blanket of stars draped across the night sky--hardly a cloud in sight. It's dark; the stars shine bright. There are no building lights to pollute the natural illumination of the star's rays. It's noiseless. It's free. It's near perfect. It would be a place to discover an infinite moment.

Here, I would lay on the grassy hill, grazing the beautiful universe--counting the white dots that potentially connect us to another world. I would find the star that was the dimmest and call it mine. A light so faint that no one else in the world would know it even existed. It would be my star. It would be a special star and have a purpose in life. But, then I would wonder... What if my dim light was the sun to another earth with life on it?

My star would then be a necessity for living beings on another planet. How would I be able to claim this star all to myself? I will happily share it with whoever needs it, with whoever wants it.

My star, this perfect place that holds an infinite moment. I want to share it. I don't want to be here a lone. I don't want to travel here by myself. What would this place be worth, if I couldn't experience it with someone. I want to share my dim star/bright sun with someone who makes me feel safe in this dark place. However, until then, this faultless moment will be frozen in a photograph.

Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decrease by being shared.

If walls could talk...

2011-11-03T04:22:00.002-05:00

These walls. As they stand tall, they know our secrets. They learn everything about us, but they're not bias. As they stand together, they protect us from bad weather. These walls. I wounder what they would say if they could talk.

My walls. They make me feel small, but I feel safe. If they had eyes, they would see my love inside. They would view a heart that's true. My walls. I wonder what they would say if they would talk.

Our walls. They hold our memories, like a dark, quiet balcony. They surround the couch as we rest, when we're our happiest. They are with us when we cry, and while the sun rises as we Skype. Our walls. I wonder what they would say if they could talk.

A wall. I need one that knows me and that protects me. I want one to feel safe and that sees true love. I hope for one that will hold my memories and that will last a lifetime.
If only my walls could talk for me.

Healthy Mind; Healthy Body...

2011-10-21T00:06:00.007-05:00

... Healthy Life!

In recent years, the most common trend sweeping the nation seems to be healthy living. If one hasn't said the following, chances are they know someone who has: "For my new year's resolution, I want to lose weight." However, wanting and doing are two different things.

Time after time, I see people fall short and lose site of their goal. Thus, I want to share my Tips on healthy living. I also want to add that this is my opinion and not medical or evidenced basic practice. It's simply from my heart and brain, which works for me.

My morning nursing assessment:

When I walk into a patient's room, I first observe the surrounding area. I look for clues to one's lifestyle, one's culture, one's health, and potential hazards to one's health. The lifestyle I live is that of my own, but the cultures I share are that of many. Though I'm Italian, I strive to be culturally competent. My health might be described as controlled chaos with potential hazards that could ultimately destroy my soul. However, the thing about health care is that we are always weighing our options--the risks versus the benefits. Sometimes it's beneficial to take a risk. Some call it careless, but I call it living.

Tip # 1: Focus on you; your soul. Care about yourself while caring for other. It's worth taking risk for the people you care for. This is good for your psyche.

Once I introduce myself, I then ask the patient the following four questions:

Can you tell me who you are?

Do you know where you are?

Tell me what today is.

Are you in any pain?

I find these questions deceiving because I don't even know who I am nowadays. I don't know where I am or where I'm going. Life is unpredictable. However, today is a new day. Find something worthy living for. Everyday is an adventure--a new paragraph in the story call Life. It's an opportunity to do something epic. Pain... It comes and goes, but pain is what makes us feel. It makes us strong. It helps us understand pleasure better. "If you're going through hell, keep going." - Winston Churchhill

Tip # 2: Find something worth living for. Even if it hurts, don't give up. It's healthy to stay strong.

I then look at the eyes for the pupils to be equal, round, reactive to light, and accommodation. I see a world lacking equality and more narrow-mind than well-rounded. The world is dark and cold. War is all around us. It's up to present to change the perception of the future. It only takes one person to lead an army--to change the perception of many. Why not raise the youth to love, to care, and to treat everyone equally?

Tip # 3: Be a good role model. Someone looks up to you. Create a healthy future.

As I place my stethoscope on the apex of the lungs, I tell the patient to take a deep breath in and out, listening to the air fill the lungs and escape again. My lungs fill with air. I breathe, but my breath is easily taken away by the right person. Everyday I wake up breathing, I am thankful because I have another chance at life.

Tip # 4: Relax and breathe. Take time each day to focus on your breathing, but don't be afraid to let someone take your breath away every now and then. Unneeded stress in your life is draining and unhealthy.

My stethoscope is then place anteriorly on the chest to auscultate the heart. My heart tells the truth. It knows my feelings before my brain can even comprehend what's going on. It becomes tachy [beats fast]. It loves strong. A picture is worth a thousand words [my friend posted the picture to the right on Facebook today]. "I took a deep breath and listened to the old bray of my heart: I am, I am, I am." - Sylvia Plath

Tip # 5: Love. Listen to your heart, express your feelings, and don't hold back. Everyday is full of missed opportunities, so don't miss out on something that's right in front of you. It's important to have intimacy and solidarity rather than isolation [Erik Erikson].

As I place my stethoscope on the abdomen, I auscultate the bowel sounds and ask, "when was your last bowel moment?" Life is full of crap, but I either take some toilet paper and clean it up... Or I plug my nose and ignore. Besides one glance from that special someone can cause your belly to tingle and make you forget all about the smelly crap. Haha!

Tip # 6: Laugh and ignored the "bull shit." Laughter, in my opinion, is a natural cure and main ingredient in health promotion.

Finally, the skins is palpated. One touch can cause my arrector pili muscle to contract, sending chill bump down my spine.

Tip # 7: Touch. It's a necessity to living.

When two heart beat as one, breathing synchronizes, and the warmth from the closeness of two bodies is felt, nothing else in the world matter. It's the feeling of being safe. The two bodies work perfectly together. It's perfect. It's healthy to focus on you, be strong, create a healthy future, relax, love, laugh, and touch.

You out there...

2011-10-02T04:09:00.003-05:00

... Is there anyone there?
Is there anyone out there for me?
I know I'm young, but I know when I feel.
I know what I felt.
But right now I feel scared.
I'm scared there is no one out there for me.
I'm still waiting...

Remember, we all stumble, every one of us. That's why it's a comfort to go hand and hand. - Emily Kimbrough

A Cat's Gotten My Tongue...

2011-09-29T00:02:00.005-05:00

... Or maybe my fingers.

Thus, it's time for a blog update!

See, a common trend in my life lately is that I have so much to say, but I don't know how to say it. I want to, but I can't because that's just the way it is for now. A cat's gotten my tongue! However, do I really have to say something for one to know?

As many may know, I am no longer unemployed. I'm a nurse on a transplant/renal unit. Recently, I have been overly busy with work, but it's a good thing. I really do love my job and caring for people; yet, I'm finding it extremely hard not to get attached to my patients--I might care a little too much. Though, I can't say much about my job because of the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act [HIPAA], which protects patient's privacy. However, I will tell you a little story about somewhat of a love triangle.

Once upon a time, there was a man and a woman. They loved each other so much that they would do anything for one another. However, the man grew to love the best friend as well. The woman was happy for the man and the best friend's love because she loved both of them very much. The man and the best friend married and lived a long life. The three of them grew old and decrepit, but their love stayed young. As time carried on, the wife grew ill and was inches away from her deathbed. Knowing this, she told her husband and the woman, "once I'm gone, I don't want you two to be sad or lonely." The wife made them promise this, and when the light carried her away, the husband and the woman only had each other. Carrying out the wife's wishes, the two traveled the country together. They visited several historical places together. They did everything together. The old friendship flourished into a stronger connection. It was pure love--pure happiness. It was/is apparent from a mile away. The man realized that love is "unpredictable but a necessity of life" no matter where or how it is achieved.

In this story, the man savors every moment and is very thankful to have a soul mate that will stay with him in his darkest hour. A best friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words.

Okay okay, I'm sure you have had enough of my sappy, somewhat melancholy mood. I just wanted to share this story with you. It gives me the chill bumps. It also makes me realize that life is unpredictable. No one could possibly ever know how it will end up. But living is the key. In time life is revealed. Your destiny will be present. The end will be near. Now is the time to live!

It's a story that gives me hope that true love and happiness exist. You're never too old/young to love, and "happiness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

Lost In A Memory...

2011-09-11T21:07:00.003-05:00

... But remembered in Lights.

TEN YEARS--it's unbelievable to me. I cannot put into words or believe that it has already been ten years since the 9/11 terrorism attack on the United States of America. A whole decade--it seems like yesterday.

Ten years ago, a nice breeze cooled the air, and the sun was out. The day seemed perfect. However, little did I know that the day was everything but perfect. Evil was knocking at our doors. Tragedy was inevitable [or was it]. Regardless of one's belief, tragedy struck the USA on September 11, 2001. The World Trade Centers crashed to the ground. Lives were lost. Families were torn apart. A country was wounded, but not defeated. Ironically, like a Shakespearean story, tragedy brought the USA closer together.

So much has changed since 2001. So much has change since middle school. So much has changed since the day I heard about two planes crashing into the World Trade Centers. Ten years ago, I was in gym. Though, I remember it all like yesterday. It felt like a nightmare, but it was reality as evident by every news broadcasting channel on TV.

Ten years ago. A decade. United we stood.

That very realistic day is now lost in a memory, but never forgotten. At dust tonight, two light towers (made up of 80 light bulbs, 7,000 watts each) will illuminate the New York sky in memory of 9/11.

Ten years later. A decade to the day. United we still stand.

Crazy or Not, Here I Come...

2011-09-09T00:12:00.008-05:00

I have a confession to make... It's my belief that "normal" people are boring. Yep, I said it... I'm the "crazy" type. I like people who aren't afraid to burst out of their shell and be who they are. They aren't afraid to be themselves.

Who defines normal anyways?

According to dictionary.com, the word normal is defined as the following:

Conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; regular; natural.
Serving to establish a standard.

Yep, quite boring! Who wants to be just regular or the usual? I know I want to be anything but the usual. I want to be unique. It bothers me when people try to fit into culture norms in fear of being judged. Folks, it's time to stop caring what people think of you. It's time to start living. BE YOU! Lets be epic!

I think one of the reasons why I like jump rope and the people involved in jump rope so much is because they are simply themselves. We, jump ropers, gladly accept that we are "a little different", and I wouldn't have it any other way. I find that I connect with people the most when they are just being themselves, real, and not caring what I think. I also find that people are the most hilarious when they are just being themselves. These people tend to be my closest friends, and I love them very much!

I'm not ashamed that I have worn boxers, crazy socks, or spandex on a college campus before. Who cares if people look at me funny when I talk about wounded ducks, cabooses, whips, or doing speed. When I was younger, I was made fun of for jumping rope. I was called "gay", "girly", and several other names--younger kids can be so cruel. However, I don't regret any of that in the least bit. It has helped me be a stronger person and the person I am today. Beside, after we did a show at my school, they shut the flip up when they saw what I could do. I think it only takes one person to change the perception of many. It's important to stand up for what you believe in. It's important to be you. It's time to stop caring what people think of you. It's time to start living. BE YOU! Lets be epic!

WARNING:

Stop reading now if you don't want to see how weird I really am...

20 Crazy Things You Never Knew About ME:

Before turning off my iPhone, I always, ALWAYS have to go back to the home screen.

My sister and I text or call each other at the same exact moment sometimes.

I have one single gray hair on top of my head in the front, and I kind of like it.

When I meet someone for the first time, I wonder what animal they look like.

I swear I have tourette syndrome when I’m alone in my car driving down the road.

When I see a sign or words on a building that’s advertising something I think to myself, “that sign served its purpose in life.”

When I hear certain songs (not mention any titles), they take over my body. I can’t help but to break out in dance and sing really loud.

When I touch something, I wonder how many other people have touched the same exact spot as me.

I tend to touch things in odd places, for this very reason.

While walking down the allies, I like to drag my hands through the articles of clothing hanging on the sale rack.

When I look at the moon, I sometime wonder who else in the world is looking at it with me.

I believe that somewhere out there in space, there is another sun warming an earth with life on it.

My favorite type of dream is the ones where I can fly by kicking my feet.

In high school, I would go out of my way to say, “hi” or to smile at the people that no one would ever talk to.

I don’t like stepping on people’s shadows.

I tend to walk on the opposite side of people’s shadows so they can walk on my shadow instead.

Sometimes I wonder how I am going to die. :-/

My biggest fear is dying alone.

Sometimes, I just lie on the ground in middle of the floor thinking about life.

As much as I don’t like spiders, I don’t ever kill them.

It's time to stop caring what people think of you. It's time to start living. BE YOU! Lets be epic!

Crazy, Stupid, Love.

2011-09-06T01:40:00.033-05:00

Never ignore a person who loves and cares for you, because one day you may realize that you've lost the moon while counting the stars.

Right now it's a little after 1:00 am, the sky is beautiful, and it's 65 degrees outside--feels perfect. The world is quiet; people are sleeping. I feel alone. It's just me, the moon, and the stars above me.

Nights like these make me think. They make me wish. They make me miss. They make me wonder. What if?

I think a lot. I don't know how to stop thinking, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. However, thinking keeps me awake sometimes. I do wish my brain had an off switch, but I'm thankful I can't control certain bodily functions. No, I'm not talking about farting. But, feelings for example... If we could control the way we felt every second of the day, I'm sure most of us would choose to feel perfect. We would choose to feel safe. However, there are so many external stimuli that mold our feelings. It's the way we react that makes the difference. As much as people wish the world was a perfect place, I'm happy that the world isn't. I'm content with not being perfect. I like discovering the imperfections of the world and finding beauty among them. To me, it's the imperfections that matter the most. Flaws are what makes us unique. They are what makes us, US. If everything/body was perfect, how would we decipher or find value amongst the world/us?

Tonight I was on Facebook, and my friend Ryan posted a status (pictured to the right). Feeling a little nostalgic, it made my eyes water just a bit. However, it also made me realize that when there is someone in your life that you really love and care for, you shouldn't take that for granted. You should put every effort towards letting them know. Never pass up the opportunity because they might not be there the next day, hour, minute, or second. Things can change in a blink of an eye. The world isn't perfect. Life isn't predictable. I know it's cliché to say, but we need to live like there is no tomorrow. No one is promised the next breath or heart beat--life.

Friday I had a date with my mother. We had lunch at Notini's Italian Restaurant (highly recommended) and saw a movie. The movie was called Crazy, Stupid, Love. It was pretty good. I'm somewhat of a sucker for chick-flicks, and I love Emma Stone. The movie is an example of how life is crazy and not perfect. How love is unpredictable. How people see others for their imperfections and love them for that. And, in the end, things turn out how they are suppose to be. I think it's important for us to have faith that life will turn out the way it's intended for us. We should trust that things happen for a reason, and we should take every chance to learn and to grow as a person.

I think everyone should take the time today, tomorrow, and everyday to tell someone they care about that they love and care about them.

YOU: I love and care! $

You is smart. You is kind. You is important.

2011-08-29T06:43:00.015-05:00

As I sit here typing on my computer, I think...
... about college. I cannot sleep; my brain is racing.
It's such a weird feeling to be a college graduate. No more dreaded eight o'clock classes. No more exams or return demonstrations. No more studying! The summer is over for most of my friends, and it still feels like I should be walking the campus beside them. I miss the good ole University of Louisiana at Monroe (ULM)--the bayou. However, as I start my career as a nurse, I will always remember the overly caring professors at ULM. I am thankful for the knowledge I gained, and I will always continue to learn.

I am smart!

As I sit here typing on my computer, I think...
... about what it means to be a nurse. I cannot sleep; my brain is racing.
It's such an accomplished feeling to be a nurse. I have work so hard to prepare, to teach, to listen, and to nurture the patient, the family, and my colleagues. To me, nursing is not a job... But simply caring. It's the comfort of a hand touch. It's the warmth of a hug. It's offering silence or talking to someone until there is nothing else to talk about. I am thankful for finding a career that I can say, "I care for a living."

I am kind!

As I sit here typing on my computer, I think...
... about my friends and family. I cannot sleep; my brain is racing.
It's such a great feeling to have loving people in my life. My friends and family are honestly the most amazing people ever. They make me feel special and important. I love them, and I am thankful they love me for me.

I am important!

As I sit here typing on my computer, I think...

... about the movie I saw today (yesterday) with a friend. I cannot sleep; my brain is racing.

The Help was such an inspiriting movie, and I think everyone should see it. A wise lady once told me, "You can't go looking for happiness because you will not find it." I now know that we hold the power of making ourselves happy. We have to find meaning in our own lives. It's important to find things we are grateful for. You never know what you are missing until it's gone (or too late), so it's important to remember that you can't take things for granted. It's the little things that matter the most. All of this first starts with our attitude towards life. So, I want you to know that...

"You is smart. You is kind. You is important."
TO ME!

Beginnings are scary, endings are usually sad...

2011-08-22T23:19:00.016-05:00

... But, I am grateful for everything in between--really.

Spoiler alert (skip this sentence if you don't want to know): Life is hard after college... Sorry to ruin the plot for you. However, no one told me this, and I'm having to find out the hard way.

Hi, I'm Chad, age *cough* 24. You may or may not have stumbled upon this post by accident. However, regardless of the method of finding my blog, I'm happy you have continued to read thus far. I feel it's unnecessary to start one on a negative note because I'm not a negative person at all. But, if anyone has seen the movie (500) Days of Summer, you may understand the way I am feeling at the moment. Though, I don't have an Autumn, nor do I have a job right now. My life is kind of at a standstill, and I don't know what to do. Okay, it's time to hit the rewind button for just a second...

REWIND ◄◄... May 21, 2011: I graduated nursing school today. It was a long and stressful road, but I made it out alive. It might be cliché to say, but if you believe, you can achieve... I am living proof.

FAST FORWARD ►►... July 17, 2011: I found out that I passed my nursing boards. All my hard work and dedication has finally paid off. I am a real registered nurse!

FAST FORWARD ►►... July 16-August 8, 2011: I am in Washington teaching/performing jump rope, learning gymnastics, and hanging out with friends. Being here has made me realize more than ever that I love jump rope and the people involved. I'm amazed at the things it is doing for the world--bringing us together. Right now, I am the happiest I have ever been. It's the middle that counts the most.

FAST FORWARD ►►... August 13, 2011: Today goes to a great person, who wants to experience life and go with the flow. However, ending are usually sad, and I'm definitely sad at the moment.

FAST FORWARD ►►... and PLAY ►... Today, in present time, I'm in sort of a limbo state. I'm not too horribly sad, but I'm not happy in the least bit. The freight train called life has hit me hard. I know what I want to do, but I don't know what I need to do. I don't know what's best for me. I think this would be a great place for a new beginning. Travel, jump rope, and nursing are the key ingredients to my happiness, but I don't know how to juggle them all. I'm begging someone to teach me how to juggle. I want to be able to do it all. I want to be happy again. I want to give life a chance and let hope float to the surface but...

I DON'T KNOW HOW, and I'm scared to death!

... If only life came with a ◄◄ REW, ► PLAY, ▌▌PAUSE, and a █▌STOP button!